Awesome Observation Two

The same Arabic tatted woman told my friend that she was boycotting the Chinese because the Chinese Govt. told bar owners not to allow black-skinned people into bars. This may or may not be true. Who knows- I haven't and don't care to read the silly rules in the Olympic handbook. That afternoon, the group of co-workers were trying to decide on where to go for lunch. This brilliant woman said she was protesting and could not eat Chinese Food. As if not eating Mr. Kim's orange chicken in the USA would do anything to the Chinese Govt. How do these people go through life and not end up winning a Darwin award???

Awesome Observation One

A friend of mine works with a woman at a large, local company. She recently got a decent sized tattoo on her (we'll say shoulder). It's in Arabic. When asked what it says, the answer is "Keepin It Real". In Arabic? I wonder what the actual translation means- Remaining clean? Oh forfrackssake.

Hello from land of the Que's!

I am on vacation and currently missing my dear Vel very badly. I don't want to share his story without his permission, but let's just say he MAY have engaged in waterworks while I was gone. It's pretty funny, although not so much to him.

I am in the desert and have learned that a dry heat is truly better than a wet heat, like in New Windsor. I am learning that eating out every meal is getting really expensive and that getting rid of all of your tchatchkis makes your house look like a resort.

Finally, I have learned that Roadrunners are not tall and go meep, meep; coyotes are not likely to eat you unless they are really hungry and you can see where it is raining all over the state from where I sit. Neat!

News too good not to share:

Yup. It's art called Complex Shit. It's in Switzerland. It got loose and took down some eletrical wires and did some other damage. It is by an American artist...what I want to know is who pays for this crap?
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Montaulk Monster - Viral Marketing or Escaped Graveling?

I just learned about this from a co-worker, apparently I was too caught in up an (gung-gung) SVU marathon to notice that monsters invaded the Hamptons this weekend. Or, more likely, an viral marketing campaign for Cloverfield 2 or something like Cryptidsarereal.com. The guy from Animal Planet that isn't Steve Irwin (for obvious reasons) says it is a carnivore and likely to be a raccoon or dog. But that was on Fox News and we know you can't believe anything they say there. Better yet, there is also a theory that there is a testing facility on something called Plum Island not far from the shore where this washed up. Perhaps it is a mistake that escaped and their Treat Williams-like security officer couldn't wrangle it in time. Who knows? Maybe it is a dead baby Cloverfield Monster who has a really, really mad mom. Although at ComicCon in June, JJ Abrams did say that while they were making a sequel, it wouldn't be a "literal sequel". So who knows? Either way, I vote for a Plum Island Escapee . It would take the focus off of John Edwards/Paris Hilton/Obama. Plus, if it were a movie, someone like LL Cool J would have to step forward and save us all.

I Hate Drama Queens

I work with one. That person sucks. They are a bully, not particularly good at managing the day to day aspects of working here and is apparently unusually misunderstood. What you can't misunderstand is this persons ability to cause drama where there is none. I don't know why they like to stir the proverbial pot and cause so much tsurus, but they do. There are only two reasons to cause so much trouble:
1. Get attention
2. Try to make yourself look important

However, most people don't realize that the rest of us just think they are a tool for causing so much drama. Life would be so much better without all of that.

In order to deal with the DQ at my office (hereby called Mitch - cut lang for Man Bitch), I will just see his inner-self as he really is. Childlike and ludicrous (say it Vel!), like the clip below.

Reason 642 I Love Joel McHale

This is just so wrong. Yet so funny.